When people tell you “we always” or “this is the way it’s always been done”,
you take that as an invitation to ask some questions, right?
After receiving an extra medical test that wasn't ordered and that I didn't consent to while I was in for a related procedure, I felt right and good about speaking up.
What surprised me was that I also questioned myself for doing so.
I made calls and my case. But, after repeated claims that nothing erroneous was performed, that there was no way the charge would be reversed and "this is the way it’s always been done"--I, too, started to doubt myself.
And that's when I realized that making others uncomfortable was making me uncomfortable.
Am I pushing too hard? Am I that crazy patient earning eye rolls and featuring in break room chat? Maybe I am wrong.
The doubt felt gross.
There are so many things that don’t make sense--and we really know it.
Like not offering maternity leave, endless meetings, or those who say teachers should be armed instead of banning weapons of war from civilian use. (Would that mean teachers get combat pay?) Or, how about the credit cards that offer all the great travel benefits, except the ones that would be useful when you find out (in line at the rebooking desk 1,000 miles from home) that your scenario is excluded?
And yet, we've got to lay off certain questions. You know, the ones we use against ourselves to battle our better instincts. The ones that make us doubt our reason, rights and conscious knowing.
Because our instincts are worthy beyond question.
No doubling back because of discomfort; to soften or be more likable. Our monkey minds will tell us that comfort is safety; but, we're really only safe when we can be vulnerable enough to use our voices.